heart eyes

Angsty teen girl talking about a holiday based on a baby with an arrow, while touching on love, relationships, single-ness, and an existential thought to end.

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Hey gang, hope you’re all doing well. It’s nearly midnight on a Sunday, but wait it gets better, in a couple of days Valentines Day is upon us. Now, we have two ways to go here. I have done both over the past 14 years or so. We can either be bitter, whine about a flying baby, or accept the fact that we can’t beat ’em, so we join them. I chose to join ’em unless ’em is code for corporate marketing ways and capitalism.

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I don’t know where I am, but it’s not complicated. I like a boy as more than a friend but at the same time as a best friend, which is apparently the “Your boyfriend is your best friend” goals, never really cared for standards. That part is complicated since the feelings between both of us have been like doing the tango on a 5 month loop. Too bad we’re too sarcastic to indicate anything between us. The easy part is that I understand that he loves me, and we are the best of chums, so do I really need to stress? At least we are in the safe zone. Tehe, he’d rather hang out with me than play GTA which is a bonus. I’ve fallen head over sneaker aglets for an ugly rat, but he’s cute o whateva.

I know this might sound boring, “Can’t relate!” “MustBeNice!!1” but haven’t we all have some sense of extra emotions towards another? A zest? I’m trying to talk about the childhood valentines days but I’m incapable of doing it in a discrete manor so here it goes : I miss childhood valentines day. The ones where we dragged bags of sweets and holographic cards with ridiculously genius sayings on them. My brother got one a few years ago thats holographic AND it’s a golden retriever. Now that’s what I call an investment. When did it all end, most importantly, why did it end? I haven’t stopped though. I refuse, last year in the 8th grade, you bet your biscuits I had my tiny plastic bag with air heads, lollipops, and disney princess cards with snarky messages of admiration imprinted on them.

Idea: An alternative title for this post would be “Puppy love” but I’m going to insert pictures of dogs throughout this whole joint!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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For the peeps who have hella heart eyes for someone, go for it! Ask yourself what happens if you don’t do anything, what if you decide to do something, or a simple “Maybe”. I’ve done this countless times with several other situations and it helps to get a somewhat image of possible paths. But, I’m a huge believer in YOLO, so I encourage you to go after anything you want. I have a friend with a ridiculous name, and I told him about my situation with “Wannabe” (what I call my egg head) and he reminded me that it’s a simple “No” if things turn south. Most of my friends reminded me countless times that I should be doing the things I promote, living in the moment, and doing the things I desire. That’s what I’m promoting you to do. Live in the moment. Life goes on. Things happen. If they happen in your favor, congratulations, you’ve hit the jackpot. If for your potential doom, gambling isn’t exactly necassory but how exciting is it to know that your own jackpot is still out there?

For the single and happy folk, yes! Being single is such a look. Honestly, iconic. Sometimes I think I can do this forever. This seems kind of empty, but here’s a happy portrait to feed your needs, people of all situations should read this. I’m not religious but I get snatched to church by my parents every week even though I don’t pay attention in there. Anyways, I was sitting in the church cushion and I had a thought, I cried because I was so starstruck :

Take any relationship you have. Someone preferably close to you, a family member, a best friend, or your mate. Now examine all of your conversations with that person, texting, talking, calling, snapping, handwritten sentiments, anything. Now convert all those times into hours. Realize how much time, in reality, you have spent with this person. It’s remarkable. I was converting my time with wannabe over new years, a convo from 9PM to 12Am (first person in 2017 ;)) which is short for us. So I took the past 5 months worth of convos into hours. I realized that if I smushed it together, if I were to just add the time of us talking without sleeping, eating, school, we would have talked for 2 WEEKS straight. Isn’t that incredible? You and the person you chose have done : That. It’s a crazy concept for me. Even crazier if I know the person for a longer period of time.

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Click here for something happy from the nostalgic valentines version of myself + a few sweet tunes aha get it, sweet, like candy, as in, valentines!

Bulletproof love – Pierce the veil – Pure guitar and soul cleansing from this classic :’)

No other heart – Mac Demarco  – What could you lose? Well for one, her heart, belooonnngggs to another and no other heeeaaarrrttt will do. A soft bop for sunsets and fresh linen aromas.

Stay – TYuS  – VERY underrated R&B artist, vibes similar to Partynextdoor. 🙂

L8r dudes 🙂

 

Author: Angie

Joker with a tan face

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